This afternoon it hit me while I sat listening to a message preached by Bishop Jakes..
It was the truth all along, I had not seen it in that way!
Before the world was created God says He knew me.. Before the foundation of the world, He said it very clearly, He called me and chose me!
Now if that is the case, how did I look in eternity! Obviously if He said this I was there..
I was in spirit form. I had not had a birth day! I had always been.. now this is deep and I can imagine it could be even deeper.. But before everything came to be, I was… I was just in my original form.. I was SPIRIT!
When my mother conceived me I was called to a body! I was already existing, and my character and the name God had given me was already there.. I just came here with a gift.. With a purpose, with A Call.. Today I dealth heavily with John and Jesus and how it is that they were both called.. Mentioned in the 1st chapter of John’s gospel.. They came forth without hesitation moving according to God’s power and although John the baptist never performed one miracle, that man was every bit as powerful as every other prophet that had ever lived.. because the spirit of the prophet was upon him.
When I thought about this I became well aware that my life has always been God’s.. It has always been His plan to use me for His glory.. And although this body is getting older everyday, my spirit never gets old.
This also means I can try as I may to connect to things, people and places here on earth but the only thing that will matter in the end, the only thing that will continue after I’m done is my spirit and that will never be able to connect to another person!
Throughout my life I keep searching for that person I was before I came to the earth. I got some type of amnesia when I was born into the flesh.. This is why I had to be reborn of the spirit.. I was already of the Spirit, I had to be born of it again, because somehow I had had a spiritual amnesia and had forgotten who I was..
This evening I noticed something on the little cage I bought my birds..
These birds we have had since March of this year, which would be 6 months.. Tweetie has never been out of the cage and the couple of times Skyler has been out has not been the best! But here it was.. I saw it for the first time ever… there was a way to open the cage and let them fly free.. I opened it immediately not thinking there would be no way for me to get them back into this cage if they happened to fly out. Aaron was normally the one who would get them in and out of the cage..
But I thought I would try it anyway, I wanted them to see what this kind of freedom would feel like..
I opened the cage and tried to put my hand in to touch them and immediately they began to go coo-coo inside the cage.. I mean they did what they normally do, but Skyler was actually bold enough to jump out.. the poor little bird did not know what he was doing.. When he did he knew he was in a different area.. He knew he was out.. Now how would he handle this.. Whatever would he do! He began to look around and he kept trying to get to Tweetie they chirped at each other a little bit and it was not long before he found a way to get himself back inside that cage.. She was there waiting. When he got in the cage he just looked at her and she at him and they chirped silently.. it was amusing to me as I sat quietly watching on my sofa..
They continued to stare at me afraid I would mess with them again.. But I just sat and watched so that they would feel comfy.. After about an hour or so they started to play around with jumping the stand on the top and look out freely! But none of them dared to get out again.. I wondered why that was.. they were offered total and complete freedom, yet they would willingly choose to stay in the place that is comfortable.
The truth is they were made to be free, not to live in a cage.. yet they don’t know that.. it would be hard to teach someone how to live outside of a box who has been taught that living in a box is the only way to live, even so it is the same with those of us who are born again.. It is hard to teach us that we must forget the things which are behind and we have to realize that when we are born again of the spirit all things have been made new. We can no longer live in connection with the flesh!
Sometimes, it used to seriously annoy me when I would hear the children outside making all the noise, I had not been exposed to this way of living (in an apartment) for years.. and to be in this kind of transition, well.. it’s been a little challenging! For the most part I have made it to where when they start making all the noise I louder my television or I turn on music or do something in another room, but there are times when I want to study and I have to make up my mind to go to a library realizing sometimes silence is good… although there was something else which was really deep I realized today.. My hearing, my seeing, my touching, my smelling and my tasting connects me to this life.. it connects me only to my earthly experience and since I have not been living in the full conclusion that I am not flesh but a spirit who is assigned to a fleshly body and thank Goodness there is an exportation date to this body, I’m going back home again.. I began to attach the things of the spirit to things that only should be connected to flesh. I can not expect my senses to guide me in communion with God I have to get out of that and walk in the newness of life.. which means when I hear noise it’s easier to tune it out.. knowing it is an outward symbol that life is going on around me, but most importantly is being aware of the life giving spirit within.
I got so much out of today it’s amazing!