Hope displaced

There are many references in the bible as it relates to hope.
I often love to begin blogs about hope repeating what a friend once told me about hope.
Ms. Ann who is a 70 year old woman who lives alone says; “a person can go 7 days without food. A person can go 3 days without water living… but a person cannot go 24 hours without hope”
As I retell the story of a small piece of my day I hope somehow this sets in.. for hope displaced is a deadly thing.
Today, on my job, I sat with a patient, she was being discharged to a psychiatric ward… of course I wouldn’t disclose her name but mainly because it could be anyone of us.
As I sat with her, because she was on suicide watch, having taken many sleeping pills in an attempt to end her life I learned a little bit about her and she learned a little bit about me.. nothing beneath the surface.. I wondered what could have made her so depressed she wanted to take ambien and end it all.. it was obvious though that she didn’t want the attempt to be successful having taken the medicine on front of a friend, it was obvious because the first thing she said to me was that she missed her shih tzu she’d had the last 13 years, since the day after her divorce.. and when she told me she wanted to go outside because the day was so beautiful and we talked about our unusually beautiful weather here in Texas having been the warmest year on record..
She and I talked about our children, she had a son, who was a young adult and my children… and my dogs too.. she told me she had been a nurse for 39 years… a friend of hers decided one day to go to nursing school giving her an invitation she accepted.. she made something of herself in that regard.. but I couldn’t for the life of me understand what would make her give such a loud and desperate cry for help….
Then as she road off it dawned on me… I know why..
That had been me 8 1/2 years ago… discouraged, dejected, abandoned, rejected and alone.. pregnant… and things weren’t working out with the man I loved and believed was my husband..
It didn’t seem to be a good season for me.. I found myself calling a friend, telling her I just wanted to go to sleep and not wake up.. before I could blink again there were police at my door to bring me to the psych ward and have me examined.. I was out in a matter of days, but the season was just as real as having married a man you believe you were supposed to be with, being abused by him, then divorcing him and being single again.. but there is something different this time.. I don’t have my hope displaced.
You see my hope is built on nothing less than Jesus blood and righteousness. I dare not trust the sweetest frame, but wholly lean on Jesus name.
There’s something that has matured just a little bit though not to full maturity yet that didn’t let me fall back there to that place when we divorced a year ago… hope! Hope for a future and hope for an expected end. Somehow I know this is only a season and like the lady I sat with today we come to realize in the midst of seasons…. they pass. But only if hope is in something greater, higher than us..


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